Making the decision to put your child into childcare can be an emotionally challenging experience. You will naturally feel concern about whether the centre you have chosen is the best possible option for your child, you may be worried about being separated from your child for such long periods and you will undoubtedly feel guilt.

According to the CareforKids.com.au 2013 Annual Child Care Survey many parents feel ''mother guilt'' is the hardest thing about returning to work.

Comments from survey respondents showed that parents feel guilty about putting their child in care, about putting their own professional needs before their family needs and about the standard of care their child is receiving and whether it would be better at home.

It is completely normal to feel a little concerned and guilty when you first put your child into care. Feelings of guilt signal the deep emotional attachment and sense of responsibility you feel towards your child.

Managing that guilt is what will help you and your child make a successful transition to childcare. The first step in learning how to successfully manage guilt is to learn to be happy with the decisions and choices you make.

By focusing on the outcomes of the decisions you have made and not feeling guilty about the opportunity costs of those decisions you will significantly lessen your feelings of guilt.

I am sure many of you will relate to the following statement which one respondent made in response to our survey:

“I returned to work when my first child was six months old, and my second child was six weeks old. I was extremely concerned about the qualifications of childcare, especially when I did not want either of them in long day care centre and instead wanted them in their own home.

This option became impossible to support financially and we soon had to resort to long day care. Our boys are now wonderful young men of 15 and 21 and in hindsight long day care wasn't really an issue. Maybe something needs to be done to help new parents understand that they are not neglecting their children or being bad parents by using this system.”

Finding high quality childcare that both you and your child are comfortable with will go a long way towards helping you deal with your feelings of guilt. By making the time to visit a childcare centre, talk to the carers and show your child around you will get a great sense of whether the centre will work for you.

Good childcare services pride themselves on creating an environment which nurtures a child's emotional, physical and intellectual development and leaving your child in a service like this should be viewed as a positive outcome not as a source of guilt or anxiety.

Even when you do feel guilty about putting your child into care, try not to reveal these feelings to your child. By alerting your child to the fact you feel as though there is something negative about them going into care you may increase your child's anxiety levels.